Monday, February 26, 2007
Danger, danger -- we have a breach!
Otherwise, Fancy Cheese Day came earlier than expected and we were able to enjoy a nice weekend of treats. I had a nice afternoon out on Saturday with a new friend from church. We walked around the Old Port and then stopped for a coffee. It was just nice to be out and sociable. She's had an interesting life and it was fun to hear someone else's stories. Also, she already knew about Lydia, and she was very tactful about it, without completely tip-toeing around the subject.
It's threatening to "Spring" here. Today it's actually above freezing, which feels positively balmy. It's been a relatively short winter, but it's been brutal while it's lasted. I'm ready for warmth and green grass and maybe a flower or two....
This is a boring post -- I mostly just wanted to vent about my breach of personal disclosure on my smoke break. Maybe it's a good thing. Maybe I need to learn to share more and not be afraid of offending (or scaring) people. It's only taken me two and a half years...
*Just to reiterate, I'd been a light on-again, off-again smoker for years, but quit completely 6 months before Lydia was conceived. Afterwards, though, all bets were off...
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Hooray for Fancy Cheese Day!
Next Tuesday is Fancy Cheese Day in our household. This is the day that we become financially solvent again. No more having to choose between heating oil and gas for the car, no more juggling bills ("So, who won't get paid *this* month?")... I can go into the grocery store and buy whatever I want, including fancy cheese. Alright, I'm not going to go overboard... I will probably restrain myself to a hunk of Morbier and maybe a little wheel of brie. But my weekly food budget will literally *double*, which will be so liberating! I can buy meat other than ground beef, a nice plump whole chicken, instead of just an econo-pack of thighs. I can't wait!
I also can't wait for these:
They should be arriving at my parents' place any day now. I'd found them before Christmas for $120 at Nordstroms. Since I didn't have $120, I just bookmarked the page and went by every now and then to have a wistful peek. A few weeks ago it occurred to me that they might be on sale by now, so I did a quick Google search and found them at SmartBargains for $50!!!! They had only ONE pair left in my size in black, so I immediately phoned my mom and asked if she would buy them for me. She pays me the princely sum of $25/month to run a website for a local historical group she's in, so I offered to take the boots in exchange for 2 months' "salary". She agreed, and my dad quickly got onto the site and snagged the last pair. (Interestingly, the price has gone up to $80 since then, even though they don't have any new stock.) I'm so excited! I'm not much of a clothes horse, but boots are a real passion for me -- I'd wear them every day, if I could. Now I just have to wait a few weeks until I go back home for a visit. (But I want them NOW!!!!!)
Other than that, my contract is going well enough. I'm dealing with a slightly less-than-competent project supervisor, who also happens to be a friend of mine, so it's a bit tricky. I'm trying to make my worth known to the company at large, while keeping a healthy distance from my "boss". He's a bright guy, he's just not a great manager. At any rate, there's not much to manage -- we each have projects to do, fairly independent of each other. I'll just do my best and hope it all works out in the end.
Until then, I'm already planning some sumptuous meals for next week...
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Birth certificates for stillborn babies
You can also listen to the NPR piece here: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=7407248
Friday, February 09, 2007
Not bad is alright
I miss her so much and sometimes it feels like time has done nothing to help me heal. It'll be her third birthday this June. Three years ago today I was holding my breath as the first trimester was nearing an end... Oh, I don't want to get into all the "what if's" and "if I'd only known's", it's just that sometimes it's still so raw and it depresses me to think that this is the way my life is going to be from now on. I know that most of the time I'm able to cope fine and that these moments aren't as endless and strangling they were at the beginning, in effect, it really has gotten better. But when I wake up from a dream where I held her in my arms and looked at her face, and I'm hit all over again with the cold reality of her loss, I feel so close to those early dark days.
Otherwise, it's been a good first (full) week at my new job. The routine has made the days fly by, but I haven't decided whether that's a good thing or not. I'm not quite enjoying life as much as I'd like to, but I'm not wallowing in despair as much as I had been, so I guess I should take the "glass half full" take on it. On the plus side, its FRIDAY! And even if I have no where to go or nothing exciting to do, at least I can stay up late and maybe enjoy a couple glasses of wine. I can worry about leading a fulfilling life tomorrow....
And Happy (belated) Birthday to Catherine!!!! Wishing you a happy, peaceful year full of soft yarn and lots of chocolate :)