Friday, January 27, 2006

My life on the bookshelf

While checking out books at the library yesterday (with only $1.25 in previous late fees -- I'm getting better!), it occurred to me that if any of the library clerks ever checked my lending records, they'd have a pretty good picture of my life over the past 5 years.

Spring 2001: My husband first moves in with me. Lots of books about decorating and home renovation, in an attempt to make the house feel more like "ours".
Spring 2002: We plan a big trip to England, so for a couple of months I took out mostly travel books.
Summer 2003: I get laid off and start taking out books on career building and self-marketing.
Fall 2003: A friend and I decided to try selling crafts together (big mistake which more or less ended our friendship), which means tons of books on candlemaking and sewing.
December 2003: We talk about getting married, so I take a few books out on wedding planning...
Early 2004: Baby's on the way! Endless books on pregnancy, pre-natal fitness, and baby crafts. This lasts until June...
Late June 2004: Loss of baby. No books for a while.
August 2004: Books on grief, trying to conceive after a loss, and lots of Dune (as a distraction).
Fall 2004: Decide to put my energies into starting my own business (basically just going freelance full-time), so armload of books on doing just that.
Spring 2005: As the only bridesmaid for my brother's fiancee living on this side of the Atlantic, it falls to me to host a bridal shower, so I pick up a few books on party planning and bridal crafts.
Summer/Fall 2005: Mostly novels and the occasional book on small business. I have obviously lulled myself into a false sense of contentedness because little did I know that my reading habits would suddenly change.
November 2005: Dr. Phil's "Relationship Rescue" tops the list, if that says anything. Lots of books with the keywords "marriage", "rebuilding", "trust", "hiring a hitman".
And finally yesterday: Unabashedly I pick up books with titles like "After the Affair", "The Mind of the Adulterous Man" and "Beginner Knitting" (I need to keep my hands busy after finding myself in the position of needing to quit smoking again).

Luckily, the faces at the checkout desk change almost weekly, so I'm fairly confident that no one pays any attention to my reading habits. Who knows, maybe this time next year I'll be reading "How to enjoy your new-found happiness, wealth and gorgeous new man while staying centered and down-to-earth". Somehow, though, I doubt it.
:: posted by Ann Howell, 10:02 AM


That is a revealing list. Good that there are books like this, too bad you're in a situation where you feel the need to read them.
Blogger Lut C., at 1/27/2006 6:23 PM  
You sound strong. You have been through so much and I think your strength is amazing. Jackie O went through all of this too--the stillbirth and the marriage problems. For me it helps to think about Jackie because she never came across to the American people as a victim but strong. I sometimes think that I must seem so pathetic, but it helps to remember that our core strength is what really matters and what people will remember us for--and you have a lot of strength. Not that you are worried about what people think, but I am mostly trying to get at the point that you are amazingly strong.
Blogger gabesmama, at 1/28/2006 9:24 AM  
I, too, wonder what the people at the library think of my choices. The same two women have seen me check out books on miscarriage, job loss, job hunting and depression. I wait for them to say something but they never do.

Sometimes I wish they would.
Blogger lorem ipsum, at 1/28/2006 3:03 PM  
That's quite a reading list - and with such an eventful life no wonder you have no time for fiction! :-)
Blogger Unknown, at 1/29/2006 6:34 AM  
Oh Bronwyn I'm so sorry for you. I've been though the marriage breakdown/divorce route, as well as a stillbirth and miscarriages. I did find me a Knight in shining armour after my divorce and I wish that for you too. From my experience it gets very sucky and then one day it all feels much, much better. ((hugs)) and thinking of you. Clare
Blogger the ockers, at 1/30/2006 3:05 AM  
I'd say that list looks like you have a rich life, with perhaps more crap than the average person and certainly more than you deserve.

I would hate to think what my library list reveals! It is mostly academic books and I'm sure I look like a real egg-head. My television view habits might be more revealing of me as a person, not a scholar.
Blogger grumpyABDadjunct, at 1/31/2006 1:17 PM  

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